Scared of Church!
When’s the last time you wore a flak jacket to church?
Probably never, if you live in America. Because here in America, church is a pretty safe place to be. At least in the physical sense.
But what if I told you more people wear flak jackets to church service than you probably realize? What if I told you, I wore a flak jacket last week in service, right in the heart of Texas? And what if I told you that when you go to church, it’s likely you’re wearing one too?
As it turns out, emotional flak jackets are in vogue among churchgoers, and have been for quite some time now.
Conceptually, we can agree that Church should be the safest place in the world for our emotions. Thousands of pastors across this country preach relationship and community every Sunday morning, and rightly so. Indeed, God calls us to be a community that first loves Him, then loves each other the way we love ourselves. But we can’t succeed in creating a community that exhibits the unconditional love of God without risking vulnerability – the risk of shame, fear, judgment, disrespect, or a bad name.
You’ve heard me say it many times (and you’ll hear me say it much more). Vulnerability breeds quality relationships. Quality relationships breed quality families and communities — safe havens that offer love and respect. The Church should be the standard of quality communities. The church should be the safest place in the world.
But it isn’t. In fact, for a lot people, Church is one of the scariest places to be.
Some people will offer a counter that because the Church offers conviction of sin, it can be terrifying to “sinners.” I agree. I am far more afraid to walk into my boss’ office after showing up 15 minutes late for work than when I am on time. Conviction has everything to do with that.
But I should be ashamed of being late. And we all should be ashamed of our sin. Sin is embarrassing, and embarrassment is definitely scary. But doesn’t that make God’s grace all the more impactful? Doesn’t that help us appreciate the freedom found in God’s forgiveness? Not a freedom to sin, mind you. Not even a freedom from conviction. But freedom to be fearless. Freedom to be open and without pretense. Freedom to love and be loved in the rawest, most natural way possible. No artificial flavoring. No preservatives.
| Too many people allow their fears to rob them of God’s love, of even receiving the love of God’s people. They walk into church with emotional flak jackets on with arms firmly folded across their bodies. Protected. They think from shame, I say from love. |
Too many people allow their fears to rob them of God’s love, of even receiving the love of God’s people. They walk into church with emotional flak jackets on with arms firmly folded across their bodies. Protected. They think from shame, I say from love.
Of course, these fears are not without warrant. How quickly some churches crucify fellow Christians. We are often the resistance to the Church’s progress. We’ve all seen it. You may even have been a victim of it. It is always troubling to hear a well-known minister caught in some sex or financial scandal. It is most often even more troubling watching the Christian community respond. It is no wonder the outsiders are scared to be themselves in our midst. Look at how we treat our own.
The best example of pure community is support groups like Alcoholics Anonymous. The first thing they have to do is introduce themselves and their affliction. “I’m Billy Joe, and I’m an alcoholic.” So simple, yet so potent. Only after they make this statement can they receive the help the group is prepared to give them. That statement, the proverbial taking off of the flak jacket and the unfolding of the arms, is the first step to recovery. Until then, they fight their affliction alone.
What if the church was something like that. I’m not saying all worship services should be a big roll call of confession, but what if that did happen once in a while? What would it change? How far would that go toward eliminating the talk of hypocrisy?
I know it’s not that simple. There are several factors to consider, and we can’t touch on them all in this writing. But perhaps this blog will start some discussion. The church should be the safest place in the world. So let’s figure out how to make it so.
Photo by That One Asian via flickr
Do you agree? Should the church be the safest place in the world? If you do, why do you think people are so afraid, and what do you think we can do to change it?
Tell me below.
__________________________________________________
